Well, believe it or not I made it through the long weekend without a stint in the hospital...so many times I just wanted to talk to my own doctor...I called her first thing this morning...and it is now 3 pm and I am still waiting for a call back...annoying, but I know she is busy.

You know this is the same high-risk doctor that I had with Kaylyn...with Kaylyn I had a regular doctor and this high-risk Dr...Dr. Adam...but now I only go to see Dr. Adam...with Kaylyn, Dr. Adam was really harsh, no bedside manner ever...I think my mom thought I was crazy to go back to her with this pregnancy, but she gave me a healthy, full-term baby...and she knows my history, which was enough for me. Surprisingly this time around she has been really great to me...maybe it is b/c this time around she is my only doctor, whereas last time that wasn't the case...also Dr. Adam only came into the picture when I started having problems...that is probably frustrating for a doctor b/c they have to be reactive rather than proactive...Dr. Adam has called me personally twice, and although she has said some harsh things a couple of times, overall I would say she is 100% better than last time. Anyways, I am waiting for her call.

Not much else to report, my mom and two of my brothers are coming on Saturday, which will help time go by faster...and give Stephen a break from house chores...I will leave you with a picture of my favorite swimming baby...man I love her...

Cramp, cramp, cramp, CRAMP!!! GOSH! I am so frustrated...my 17P shot did not make me feel better, as I was hoping it would...I have talked to my doctor, and she told me to take Ibprofin...I hate taking it, b/c I know you aren't supposed to take it while you are pregnant. WHY can't I be normal? Seriously...I know I shouldn't say it, but it's NOT FAIR!! I have to make it to Tuesday, and hopefully I can talk to my own doctor (I talked to the on-call Dr yesterday, and she was a you know what to me)...I hope I don't have to go into the hospital...I just wish she would put me on a different tocolytic (these are the drugs that stop contractions/cramping)...b/c I have obviously broken through the tocolytic that I am currently on. Anyways, that is my venting session...I am going to go drink a bunch of water now...that is one other thing they tell you to do to help cramping, although I can't tell a flip of a difference if I drink a ton of water...so annoying...Please God, take away my crampiness!!! PLEASE!

I have been wasting time, so I created a few tickers for little milli...pretty sweet huh? Which one do you like the best??

Stephen and I went to the doctor yesterday...not any exciting news, my cervix is still closed, which is good, but I am still contracting! I was doing pretty good in the contraction department, until yesterday afternoon..since then I have been having about 1 or 2 an hour...not every hour though...it is just so frustrating! People tell me to relax and not think about the contractions, but they are not comfortable...it is like saying try not to think about it to a person with an ear infection, or a tooth ache...you can't not think about it b/c it hurts!!!

I can't help but notice a slight pattern with my bad days in relation to my 17P shots. Last week my bad days were Monday and Tuesday, the doctor told me to take some ibprofin (not usually advised when you are preg) so I felt better on Wed, then I got my shot on Thursday...I have been feeling really good until yesterday (Tuesday), so I am hoping when I get my shot tomorrow I am back to feeling good again...and hopefully next week I will feel bad on Wed (see the pattern?), and get my shot that next day, and then the next week get my shot on the same day that I might feel bad...oh how I hope I am right!

Oh one thing the doctor did say was that Milli was a big kid! Way to go Milli!! He is about 11 oz already...According to my books babies are usually 6-8 oz at this time...I hope I have a big, fat, healthy baby in OCTOBER!!

Today Milli is 18 weeks 3 days old...you don't have to be a mathematician to know we are approaching the 20 week marker. 20 weeks just kinda freaks me out a little...

To fill those of you who might not know, 20 weeks was when I had major complications with my first pregnancy. I remember it was a Monday morning, early, like 4 am, and I woke up bleeding...pretty bad...it wasn't painful at all, but it was really scary. I called the doctor and went into labor and delivery (this is a part of the hospital). I remember that Stephen dropped me off to park the car, so I went up to L&D by myself, the nurse said can I help you? and I just burst into tears...they took me back to a room and hooked me up to a bunch of monitors, and sure enough I was contracting (although I didn't know it b/c they weren't painful...) after a couple terbutaline shots, which make your heart race, my nurse and now friend Kay, checked my cervix, and it was only a "finger tip" long. For those of you that don't know cervix talk, the "normal" pregnant woman is supposed to have about 4 cm of cervix until they go into labor and then the cervix thins out (effaces) and then opens (dilating)...

I was in the hospital for about 4 days, and I remember on the first day after they got my contractions somewhat under control, someone told me I was going to be on bedrest for the rest of my pregnancy...I didn't really know what that meant at the time...but man did I find out...

I was so scared from that point on, that I religiously laid in bed for 12 weeks. I only got up to go to the bathroom and take a shower. I ate laying down and never left the house (unless to go to the hospital or doctor)...around 34 or 36 weeks I started to lighten up and not be quite so scared...and Kaylyn came at 38 weeks and 4 days...

I made many other trips to the hospital, at 24 1/2 weeks I broke through my oral terbutaline and was in the hospital on Magnesium for about 3 days and sent home with a pump in my leg, that only lasted about a week, then I was admitted to the hospital for 2 straight weeks on Magnesium again, until I got to 28 weeks...after 28 weeks most babies can survive...

Right now I am on modified bed rest, which I take to mean, take it easy, don't do house work, and lay down as much as I can...I pray I don't have to go through all I went through to have Kaylyn, but I know that if I can do it once I can do it again...and I owe it to the little boy inside me to do my best...

Milli is 18 weeks old today! WHOO WHOO! Only 10 more weeks until we are "in the clear" so to speak. Kaylyn stayed home with me today, I probably should have taken her to Mrs. Mary's, but I am so attached to her lately. Kaylyn is getting really good at doing puzzles and wants us to read to her ALL the time. I can't believe she is going to be 2 in July...time sure does go by fast...hopefully the next 10 weeks go by just as fast...Stephen and I got a key lime pie from this little shop "pie in the sky"...we are going to chow down and watch the Mavs...hopefully they beat the hell out of the Spurs...GO MAVS!!

My mom left today, big time bummer...but she promised to come back soon (I am going to hold you to that mom). There were no real highlights today, my mom and I watched a pretty stupid movie, the sisterhood of the traveling pants...I do not recommend this movie. Other than that it has been a pretty boring day...

Oh wait, I forgot...I got my second 17-P shot...which I was very anxious about. 17-P shots are kind of a newly found prevention for preterm labor...they have proven very effective, and most women who receive these shots will carry to at least 34 weeks. Anyways I got my first shot a week ago today (I will get a shot every week until either 32 or 34 weeks). When I get my shot a nurse comes to my house and listens to the baby and takes my blood pressure, and then gives me the shot, and then leaves...well my first shot was HORRIBLE...the nurse had told me that the shot was going to hurt, so I naturally assumed that she meant after the shot I would be a little sore...oh was I wrong...see the shot is given in your butt/hip area...so this big a nurse tells me to stand up and to make myself pigeon toed and lean over my recliner (if you are laughing you are a jerk)...anyways I was screaming in pain...this shot is in a really thick suspension (ie castor oil)...and the thicker the suspension, the more it hurts...so I was crying and screaming and not looking forward to my next shot. My mom suggested icing the hell out of my a (literally) and trying to lay down instead..so today I had ice directly on my butt for 30 minutes prior to the shot, and you know what? It worked! Praise the Lord, b/c I don't know if I could take 16 more shots like the first one. So I guess I did have a highlight...that might not sound like a highlight to you, but if you knew how bad the first shot hurt you would understand...Peace out

Today was a pretty good day, especially compared to the prior day. It helps that my mom is here...she is the best. I wish we lived in the same city...hopefully someday. Anyways, not much went down today (which is good). Kaylyn has gotten to stay home the past couple days b/c my mom is here. I wish Kaylyn could stay home with me everyday, but I really can't take care of her and do things with her the way she deserves...here is a picture of my mom and Kaylyn hanging out in the backyard...did I say my mom is the best??

Well today Milli and I are 17weeks 4days...to tell the truth it has been a rough 24 hours...more cramping and contractions than I have been having. My mom came in today to help out, Stephen was supposed to be going out of town, but his trip got cancelled...but I am glad my mom is here, I already feel better...I did call the doctor though, so I am afraid I might be admitted, even if I feel a little better than I did this morning. I just wish I could fast forward to 28 weeks...

OK I just went to the doctor and she said that my cervix is holding, which is good, she told me if I have more than 3 contractions an hour she would admit me and put me on mag...I am sure that mag is in my future somewhere...I wish it wasn't, but I know it is...hopefully it won't be for another month or so...